It has been my experience that some people I've met who have some sort of debilitating illness have a source for that if it occurred during adulthood. Most illnesses can find their roots in a traumatic experience, which may have resulted in any number of negative emotions: fear, hate, anger, resentment, abandonment, unforgiveness, anxiety, self hatred, vengefullness, sarcasm, etc... the list is lengthy. These emotions held inside without resolution may - and usually do - cause a physical symptom to occur.
Louise L. Hay in her book
You Can Heal Your Life, and Karol K. Truman in her book
Feelings Buried Alive Never Die both address this phenomena. After I was diagnosed with the dermatomyocitis, I had to take a huge look at the source. Both of these books were recommended by a Naturopath that was assisting me in finding the source for my dis-ease, as Louise Hay likes to put it.
Heartbreak Hurts
If a person who is generally healthy, eats right, exercises, has a positive attitude, and all of a sudden becomes ill - something happened. In my case it was stress and heartbreak. I can honestly look at my life and my symptoms and know that the two are linked. Nothing else happened prior to my getting sick, no change in my diet or routine, just an abrupt nonsensical end to a relationship that I cherished.
When that happened, I had to re-think everything that I had done to lead to that moment in my life. What had I done? How had my choices gotten me to that place? and How was I going to keep from repeating that tragedy in my life.
Since then I have recognized a pattern of unhealthy relationships that took me down this road - each one similar to the other in some way.
Be responsible with your decisions
We are ultimately responsible for our decisions. We can either repeat patterns of behavior, or recognize them, change OUR mind, and make different decisions. I chose to change my mind.
With the help of the two books mentioned above, a prayer life, journaling, and time out of a relationship and choosing to be single while I heal, my body has been recovering. None of the healthy tactics I had used previously worked. I was healthy when I got sick. This was clearly an illness resulting from dis-ease in my psyche.
Why am I telling you this? Because sometimes you have to take a look at this emotional part of your life to determine why you are ill. You have to be willing to look inside, reflect, and be real about your emotions. Emotions are an important part of who we are as people; however, emotions are either helpful or detrimental to our well-being.
Making relational changes
I recently had to sever a relationship with someone whom I love dearly because their constant dwelling on the past, holding grudges, unwillingness to forgive, and negativity created an insurmountable barrier to peace between us. It was a source of constant negative emotions hurled in my direction that was keeping me from healing completely and functioning normally.
Madea said it best
Madea said it best when she said
: "Some people are meant to come into your life for a lifetime, some
for only a season and you got to know which is which. And you're always
messing up when you mix those seasonal people up with lifetime
expectations.
I put everybody that comes into my life in
the category of a tree. Some people are like leaves on a tree. When the
wind blows, they're over there... wind blow that way they over here...
they're unstable. When the seasons change they wither and die, they're
gone. That's alright. Most people are like that, they're not there to do
anything but take from the tree and give shade every now and then.
That's all they can do. But don't get mad at people like that, that's
who they are. That's all they were put on this earth to be. A leaf.
Some
people are like a branch on that tree. You have to be careful with
those branches too, cause they'll fool you. They'll make you think
they're a good friend and they're real strong but the minute you step
out there on them, they'll break and leave you high and dry.
But
if you find 2 or 3 people in your life that's like the roots at the
bottom of that tree you are blessed. Those are the kind of people that
aren't going nowhere. They aren't worried about being seen, nobody has
to know that they know you, they don't have to know what they're doing
for you but if those roots weren't there, that tree couldn't live.
A
tree could have a hundred million branches but it only takes a few
roots down at the bottom to make sure that tree gets everything it
needs. When you get some roots, hold on to them but the rest of it...
just let it go. Let folks go."
What type of person are you?
If you are the person that is ill, you need to decide what type of person YOU are to yourself and to the people around you. Are you a constant source of negativity that drives people away? Are you always sick? Are you trying to heal but don't want to let go of the personal injuries you choose to own?
Or are you ill because of the choices you make? The people you continue to associate with that bring you down? Are you comfortable in your dis-ease? Is that all you've ever known? and wouldn't know what to do if you were healthy? happy? or had a good relationship? Do you believe you are unworthy of happiness or a good relationship?
If any of those questions make you angry, then the answer is probably yes and you are dealing with an illness tied to your emotions.
In this case, the choice is completely yours. There is no doctor or therapist on the planet that can help you until you decide to help yourself and let go of your present circumstances and way of thinking - or nothing will ever change.
Do you want to change your life?
If you do want to make a change, I recommend the books above, and my other blog spot for starters:
matthew2239.blogspot.com titled "Love Your Neighbor as Yourself - You First."
There was absolutely nothing that I could do in the way of healthy eating or medicine that helped me heal through the dermatomyocitis. The meds kept me from getting worse and eliminated the symptoms to some degree. However, the symptoms were consistent with my emotional state, and I had to work through healing those emotions.
I am off meds and on the mend. I feel better, and I am getting smarter with the emotional choices that I make and the company I choose to keep. Remember: I choose. I took responsibility for my state of being. I made the choice to change. I cannot pass the blame onto my circumstances, or the people involved in my life at the time all this occurred. And neither can you. You must choose your change. You cannot blame anyone including yourself.
It's a New Year
This is a New Year with new possibilities. It is the perfect time to look to the future and decide what that will look like for you. I wish you all the best and blessings for a happy and prosperous healthy you future.
